Well I arrived back in the states last night from an incredible week in Haiti. God did some life-impacting and life-changing things. I can’t wait to begin and write all of my stories and even video blog some but right now I just want to reflect. Today has been an extremely emotional day. I woke up at Haiti time and couldn’t go back to bed. Tears filled my eyes as my heart longed to still be in Haiti. It was so hard to leave. It is so hard to come back to a world full of people trying to live the “American dream.” Materialism is everywhere. You can’t get a way from it. This morning I had a hard time putting on nice clothes, taking a hot shower, straightening my hair, and putting on my make-up. It was just hard. Living in Haiti for a week, on a roof and in a tent, really made me thankful. Living in a community plagued with poverty, opened my eyes and broke my heart. I hurt for the poor and the orphans and the widows. Seeing a starving child who will do anything for a piece of rice broke my heart. The filthiness of the city hovered like disease in the air. God has truly changed my life on this trip and has let me see things in a different light. He has taught me how to be still and listen and discern when He is speaking to me.
One thing that has really been on my heart is the fact that God calls us to the Nations. Our whole purpose on this earth is to live our lives for the glory of Christ. To bring glory to His name, not to ours. Americans have disconnected Gods blessings from His purpose. God has blessed me so that the nations will know Him and see His glory. God has blessed me so that I can give to others. God saves me so that the nations will know Him. Every time I go to another country I am in awe of how hungry they are for Christ. Some countries don’t have the freedom to read and study the bible or practice Christianity, but no matter what, these people will do whatever it takes to get their hands on a bible. They will gather in underground places secretly for hours upon hours a day to read God’s word. They hunger for it. They thirst for it. They long for it. Where is our passion? When will we get to a point where we crave God’s word? Where we long for it? Where we study it for hours and hours a day? Why don’t we? America has a mentality of “We don’t need God.” We as a nation may not realize we believe this but subconsciously we do. America has everything they need: food, shelter, the comforts of everyday life, government, welfare, food stamps- What do we need God for? Now, other countries need God. That is all they can rely on. They are starving, sick, dying from disease, living in poverty. Their survival and entire day is spend on finding food to eat. They have nothing else. They need God. He is all they have.
Are we going to spend our life fulfilling the American dream, conforming Christianity and the gospel to where it fits within our comfort zone (David Platt, Radical). This has a great price, millions of people remain in the dark. I know I don’t want to see millions remain in the dark. I want to impact nations. I want to have the heart of God; God’s heart is for the world. This requires whole-hearted devotion and sacrifice to God. Complete FAITH. God is committed to providing abundant resources in support of those who are living according to His purpose. I have had to tell myself that though I can’t see what is ahead, my faith is in Christ and I know with all of my heart He will guide my steps. I can make plans but the Lord will determine my steps. I am not sure what is next in my life but I know I am called to the nations!