I woke up this morning with just a stirring in my spirit. A hunger and a longing for more. I began to sing, “I’m full Lord BUT I’m not satisfied.” I want more.There has got to be more. These past few months for me have just been an unsettled place. I feel like insecurity has stolen a lot from me lately and the dreamer in me I can’t seem to find. I’ve thought more these past couple of months about things I don’t have and the places I’m not at in life. I’ll find myself wondering if and when I’ll ever enter a new season, if that day will ever come. The enemy wants me to think that I am unworthy and that I don’t matter. And some days he wins. My quiet time has been met with distractions and focus doesn’t come easy but this morning it was different. I could just feel Jesus wanting me to sit a little longer and if I was honest, most of the time I don’t. I prayed that the Lord would give me a passage of scripture and Isaiah 42 popped into my head. I turned there to read…
“Look at my servant, whom I strengthen.
He is my chosen one, who pleases me.
I have put my spirit upon him.
He will bring justice to the Nations.
He will not shout or raise his voice in public.
He will not crush the weakest reed or put out a flickering candle.
He will bring justice to all who have been wronged.
He will not falter or lose heart until Justice prevails throughout the earth.
Even distant lands beyond the sea will wait for his instruction.”
– Isaiah 42:1-4
I read it a couple of times and God’s character came to life in me. A character of gentleness, encouragement, justice, and truth. A man who died for me and will meet me right where I am. A God who doesn’t expect perfection but a heart that’s lead to repentance. And then, I realized who I am with Christ’s spirit inside me. A daughter of the king who He daily strengthens. Who is not only noticed by Him but KNOWN by Him. I am His servant and He has CHOSEN me for a divine purpose. A purpose that has value and is not thrown away. He has placed His spirit inside of me that carries great and mighty power. What beautiful truth this is.
As I began to sit in this truth I felt the Lord say, “Even on your darkest and hardest days when you want to give up, you will not falter or lose heart for I will strengthen you. So keep on. Keep your eyes on me. I will not abandon you. I am doing something and you are growing even though you feel like you are not.” And then the last verse of Isaiah 42 spoke to my heart so deeply. “Even distant lands beyond the sea will wait for his instruction.” People are waiting for the HOPE of Jesus. For just a glimpse of this LOVE that is above anything else. And if we are servants of Christ with His Holy Spirit living in us then there are people and lives WAITING on me and on you, for my voice and for your voice. There are lives out there somewhere that our lives are suppose to touch; moments that God has divinely orchestrated for His glory to be made known. Lives are waiting and their breakthrough is dependent upon our obedience. And if I let insecurity, doubt, and fear take over, their story may never be written.